Oh ! that cooing in my head !

The door bell rings and before you even open the door, somehow you know who the visitor is, even when you aren't really expecting her or you have been thinking about a friend whom you haven't met since long time and he calls up the very next day or sends an e-mail . You are meeting someone for first time and everything appears to be fine yet there is this gnawing perception about the person that conveys “something just doesn't feel right ".These are experiences, I'm sure we all have had in life. Rarely do we pay much attention and generally shrug them off.

I often here a mystic voice, cooing in my head when I least expect it. Yeah, it appears at its will and tortures me sometimes. What I hate most about this voice is that it’s completely ungovernable! I am in middle of some important conversation and the voice tells me to note down what has just occurred to my mind during that interaction as there is hidden potential for a great story waiting to be written. Surprisingly, this voice is in perfect harmony with my mind and heart when it appears and I feel as if there is some extraordinary positive energy connected to my core that surfaces when it feels the need. There have been instances where I have ignored the voice, irritated by its intrusion and sometimes ended up making bad choices and wrong decisions! Generally, this voice is a gentle whisper but only once in my life it literally shouted at me!

In April 2008, I was to take my mother in law to the hospital as she was having some serious health issues. Hours before I was to leave, this voice in my mind commands, “DON’T GO ". I was terrified and annoyed at the same time. It had such impact on me that before leaving, I became completely numb and took abnormally long time deciding which pair of shoes to wear! As if, I was hypnotized by this powerful voice that was holding me back. After the struggle to get out of its spell, I left for the hospital and completed all the checkups required for my mother in law. Whole day of meetings with different doctors had made us tired and eager to reach home. As we walked towards the parking zone, I slipped and fell miserably and before I could realize what had happened in that fraction of second, I heard my bones break. My knee cap was broken into four pieces and I had to undergo a major surgery that made me bedridden for three months. It took me six months to get back to my normal self but that experience taught me not to take the voice in my head very lightly!

We live in times, where anything that can't be understood with reason is not accepted easily. How do I then explain this ability of perceiving subtle dimensions behind many events, which is beyond intellect and without a clear inference or reasoning? We are all gifted with this ability that we recognize as " gut feeling", " intuition", " premonition ", " telepathy", but we don't acknowledge it unless some event takes a dramatic turn, that influences our life deeply, that we start relating to power of that "inner voice"! I would rather not discuss scientific details on this topic as that is realm of psychology and parapsychology.

I have realized that the voice in my head is my guardian angel that was trying to warn me earnestly on the day of my fateful accident! I listen to it more carefully now and try to understand what it really conveys. The more I'm tuned to my guardian angel, the more I'm able to understand world around me better! Ever since, I have stopped resenting it (well, not successful yet so completely, I must admit!) and try to be at peace with this angel, it works great as my inner compass that helps to strike fine balance between reason and beyond.